Is It a Good Thing Leaving Our Kids with Grandma?
Benefits of Grandparents Childcare and intergenerational Bonding
While leaving the kids for a certain period of time daily with the grandparents is not a common practice in the Western culture, it is very much part of our Asian culture, especially in Malaysia where it is normal even for three generations living under the same roof because of our close-knit family structure.
We’re sure most of us here have their parents helping out in watching over our kids, fetching from the school or even supervising homework. This is because the concept of individualism is idealised in the Western world while we value permanent bond with the parents even after the children become adults.
But beyond culture, this unique intergenerational bonding between our children and our parents do play a huge role in enriching the lives of both sides. Let’s talk about this!
Benefits for Our Parents
Give Our Parents a Sense of Purpose and Meaning
For our parents, acting as mentors to the younger generations provides a profound sense of purpose. Engaging with their grandchildren, sharing family stories, and passing down traditions helps them feel valued and significant. This intergenerational interaction ensures that they leave a lasting legacy, filled with valuable experiences, skills, and wisdom for the next generation.
Well-Being; Physical and Mental Health
Interacting with children helps our grandparents feel less isolated and lonely, significantly boosting their well-being. Studies show that seniors who volunteer or spend time with grandchildren report higher levels of well-being and lower disability rates. These interactions keep them physically and mentally active, fostering a healthier lifestyle.
Learning New Skills
While our parents impart their life experiences and wisdom, our children can actually introduce them to new technologies and perspectives. This mutual learning process keeps our parent’s’ minds active and engaged, helping them stay connected with the world through social media, email, and the internet.
Benefits for Our Children
Learning to Slow Down and Have Patience
Interacting with the older generations teaches children to slow down, be patient, and listen well. Whether it’s walking alongside a grandparent or waiting for them to communicate, these experiences foster empathy and compassion, creating a more understanding and caring society.
Gaining Wisdom and Knowledge
Spending time with grandparents allows children to learn about the past first-hand. Hearing stories from older generations provides valuable insights into history, heritage, and family traditions. This knowledge not only connects children to their roots but also enriches their understanding of the world.
Learning That Everyone Has Value
In a youth-focused society, meaningful interactions with our grandparents help younger generations appreciate the contributions of older adults. Recognising the value of seniors’ experiences and wisdom instils a sense of respect and gratitude in children, promoting a more inclusive and respectful community.
Benefits for Both Children and Grandparents
Cognitive Stimulation and Broadened Social Circles
Intergenerational interactions stimulate cognitive function in both seniors and children. For seniors, engaging with children invigorates and energises them, improving their mental health and memory. For children, these interactions enhance their social skills and broaden their understanding of different life stages.
Emotional and Mental Health Benefits
For both generations, intergenerational bonding reduces feelings of sadness and isolation. These shared experiences bring joy and something to look forward to, significantly boosting their emotional well-being. Children learn to understand and accept their own ageing, while seniors experience increased self-worth and esteem.
Grandmother and Mental Health
Whether you call Opah, Po Po or Patti, the presence and involvement of grandparents provide stability and emotional support, mitigating difficult times for our children. A study conducted by the University of Turku in Finland examined data from a survey of 1,566 youth aged 11 to 16. The research found that investment from maternal grandmothers could protect grandchildren from the negative effects of adverse early-life experiences. These experiences, such as abuse, neglect, or living in poverty, can have lasting impacts on brain development and mental health.
So intergenerational bonding between grandparents and grandchildren offers a wealth of benefits, from emotional and cognitive development to the preservation of family traditions. Encouraging these relationships not only enriches the lives of both generations but also strengthens family bonds and promotes a more compassionate society. Embracing this intergenerational connection can create a legacy of love, wisdom, and mutual respect that spans across generations.
So if your parents are okay with you leaving your children, do not feel guilty as it’s mutually beneficial for everyone involved!
